沈阳 Shenyang, China 2017

Shenyang, the capital of Liaoning province, will always remain a special place in my mind. For the first time, I spent the Chinese new year with my very good friend and his family here. As a penny-pinching Ph.D. student, when I was thinking that I would be doomed to spend my 3 weeks’ holiday in Tsinghua Campus alone, my friend called me, invited me to spend the Spring Festival with his family in Shenyang, and 马上 (without making delay) bought tickets and reserved hotel online. Although I always told everyone that he soon became my other best friend since we started our Ph.D., I decided this time that I should introduce him to my Chinese friends as my 老朋友! And indeed its a perfect fit, given he walked me through many of his memory lanes like showing me the shortcut he used to take to his primary school, the middle school he used to attend, the 食堂 where he used to go with his then-girlfriend and the wife to be in future, and what not…even though it has been less than four years since we first met, we had a wonderful time together talking about our Ph.D. life, sharing personal life problems (mostly mine :p ), attending conferences together, debating IR theories (or learning from him :p ), and of course, mourning about our funding. So, because of his encouragement, Shenyang quite unexpectedly became the fourth provincial capital I got to visit since I came to China for the first time.

春节 or the Spring Festival is a significant Chinese event that any foreigner should experience at least once in their life. There is so much emotion, culture, and expectation wrapped around this new year celebration. I still remember, one of my past Chinese teachers in Changchun told me how this time of the year was like a period of hope, celebration, and pure happiness amidst the hardship her family had to go through. It’s the time when people travel miles despite much discomfort of a crowded and chaotic train station, standing inside the train for hours if tickets are not available, and the list goes on. But rejoining family members, making 饺子and preparing food during the night for family guests, receiving 红包,and reconnecting with cousins, 阿姨,奶奶 and all types of family members you can think of are some examples of pure joy that make 春节 so special in the Chinese hearts. I was utterly excited and felt honoured to be able to witness it, absorb it, and participate in it. A heartfelt thank you to my friends 博闻 and 龙菲。

It was such a lovely opportunity to meet my friend’s mom, to have such a sweet experience to talk to his grandmother, and to receive their unreserved love and care during my four days in Shenyang. And of course, I was happy to enjoy time with my friend and his wife, THE cutest couple I have met, period. I ate like a pig, learned to make 饺子,was moved by the thoughtfulness of my friend’s mom who prepared food that I would love to eat, and I felt the warmth of my own grandma when I met Bowen’s grandma, who made chicken wings for me and made sure I eat them more than any other dishes.

Shenyang is also a 不错 place for tourists minus the bitter cold in winter. It has a rich history as it was once the capital of the early Qing dynasty. It has the Manchu’s imperial palace or Mukden Palace (故宫), which is a modest version of Beijing’s 故宫. It’s a must-visit place.

Then the tombs of the Qing emperors are a great place to check out. I visited the 北陵公园 where you can find the North Tomb. It was a sunny day with a bitter cold of -20 degrees celsius, and I braved to walk for one and half hours to see the beautiful scenic place.

Then there is also Zhang Xueliang‘s office and his grand mansion with mixed architecture. He was, in reality, a warlord, who has a very special place in modern Chinese history as he fought against the Japanese invasion, helped forge an alliance between the Chinese communist party and the Koumingtan, and remained a hero of the Northeast despite the fact that he never returned to China.

Four days just flew by! It’s time to say goodbye to a wonderful family and I hope to see them again, and perhaps go back to Shenyang in summer someday.

宁波, 南京, 苏州 Ningbo, Nanjing, Suzhou China 2016

宁波 Ningbo :范钦的天一阁图书馆

Fan Qin’s private library Tianyige is the oldest private library in China. He founded it in 1560. It was a breathtaking tour for me. It’s full of beautiful gardens with interconnected ponds. The whole place was beautiful and mystical. The family history and their delicate interest in building the library and preserving 70,000 volumes of books of historical records and civil exams are simply admirable. It would be a pity if you go to Ningbo but fail to visit the library. I strongly recommend going there on weekdays to avoid crowds. I was able to enjoy the depth of their majestic work, history, and gorgeous gardens in a serene atmosphere. I was also moved by the fact that my Chinese surname is also Fan, the same as Fan Qin.

微信短信 (六月十三号):“昨天妈妈说,最年夏天你不在家,前年在阿根廷,去年在欧洲,今年在中国,现在家里一直空空,听到有点儿难过,但是今天跟David在宁波过的时间改变了我的感觉,对我来说宁波的最意义的印象是”天一阁”,范钦的图书馆,中国的最旧私图书馆,非常喜欢那个图书馆,现在对范钦有感兴趣,还是他是我的本家,然后去见Nottingham 大学的教授,在茶厅喝好喝的茶,太感动John请我们很好吃的很多菜,谢谢Simon一直给我们看宁波。最后太感谢David带我去宁波,今天很高兴!”

Food in Ningbo

Seafood (海鲜) in Ningbo is well known. I was lucky that I got treated with sumptuous lunch and dinner. The dinner by the Yong river (甬江) was particularly memorable for its beautiful view. We also went to taste different types of tea at a tea shop (茶厅). I am thankful to David Zhou’s friends for giving us a great tour of Ningbo.

南京 Nanjing :天下为公 The Whole World as One Community

It would be a shame if you go to Nanjing but don’t pay a visit to the Nanjing Massacre Memorial Hall (南京大屠杀纪念馆) and Nanjing University. Take your time to check out the memorial, the melancholic yet stimulating walk along its historical details will make you ponder about the nation’s deep-seated grievance.

San Yat Sen’s Memorial is a beautiful place to visit. The gate is engraved with the message (天下为公) ‘The whole world as one community’. One of the best ways to get there would be to get off at the nearest subway station and then a cab to the mountain. The whole area is huge, it’s wise to take a whole day to check out the area, with plenty of opportunities to hike.

Nanjing University & 拉贝旧居 (John Rabe’s House)

What really drove me to Nanjing University – besides the fact that I try to visit well-known universities in almost every city I go to – is that during the Nanjing massacre, the campus became a safe zone for internally displaced people. The safe zone was the result of a selfless effort by the foreign consulate members then residing in Nanjing, who apparently were under severe pressure and had to swallow insults from the occupied Japanese military officials. It’s a bit difficult to find out John Rabe’s house. He was an instrumental figure to accommodate and save many local Chinese during the Japanese invasion. His house in Chinese is called 拉贝旧居. I was a bit disappointed that many Chinese students on the campus who we asked did not have any idea where the house was.

微信短信 (七月三号)“紫山的一封信:今天我去看南大的唯一原因是缅怀有些勇敢心!我不知道如果我们心里有没有一个Eichmann, 而且 如果情况会使我们 Hannah Arendt’s “banality of evil” 的受害者,但是我们知道有些人在南大,包括 德国的John Rabe在内,救过几百多中国人。所以今天领导我的朋友们找到了南大内”拉贝旧居”,站着那里想想虽然那时的危险情况,他们怎么敢坚持救人命,实现了人道主义安全区。对我来说,南京大学的最意义的地方是”拉贝旧居”。真可惜,我们不能进去!朋友们,如果你们去南京,除了南京大屠杀纪念馆,还去南大,缅怀他们!”

Nanjing Food

Nanjing food is undoubtedly one of the most sophisticated delicacies in China. Especially its 大排档 (Da Pai Dang), the traditional concept of the open-air restaurant is a must place to visit to enjoy live folk music and treat your palate with full content. You must try fried dumplings( Jiaozi 饺子), the royal chicken dish (王府泡椒鸡) and 包子 (baozi). I bet the chicken dish will instantly melt you with heaven’s bliss. The good thing is they have pictures on their menu.

苏州 Suzhou: The Water Town

Suzhou is a water town, and there are plenty of them near Zhejiang. Suzhou is famous and beautiful. I was there just for a day to visit the Xi’an Liverpool Jiaotong University. So I barely had time to check out the place. There are some wonderful gardens and I have to go to the city again to absorb its beauty. My walk on the alleys by the canals was shrouded with some personal emotions. So while the place was just chaotic and overcrowded, I somehow managed to find an alley and sat there contemplating life, well don’t want to sound too dramatic here :p


A few more steps,
I am puffing through a wilful recluse.
A few more thoughts,
perhaps you’ll mutter a retort, a reason.

On these rolling hills,
I’m left with a sun lashing on your naked skin.
Whipped and overpowered by your voice
that said, “We will be by the West Lake.”

Here I am now –

The crowded room, the moving train,
and your eyes see my fingers-
playing with those black, long hair.
Crawling, smelling like a beast with a bursting chest,
I am drawn in your savage comeliness.
Draped on the bare skin of your neck.
You – Set this mind in peace.

Take me, ruin me –
In the weight of your love.

杭州 Hangzhou, China 2016

There is a terrible silence that’s wrapped around me. As I walk, breathe and lose myself in this borderless habitat of rolling green hills and dreamy lakes of Hangzhou, I am reduced to a mere silence inside. It’s difficult. Stolen in its poetic foolishness, I am awed by everything that’s unfolding in my life, a bit stupefied, a bit stubborn, and a bit reckless in gambling for where my mind takes me to.

Hangzhou is a romantic city. Don’t come here for a day or a week, don’t yearn for its embrace only if you are stopping by. Linger yourself here like the water in its lake has a sticky affinity to its surrounding green madness. Rest your mind in peace when you are breathing heavy, when you feel the first dash of sweat on your skin, by sitting on a rock on top of a hill, and looking aimlessly far away beyond the green slopes, beyond the West Lake, beyond the blue sky, unoccupied, with a dare to lose everything for a moment. Feel free not to remember anything, except those few hearts, those smiles, those promises, and that pair of eyes!

And don’t be a half-hearted human.

If you can really find Hangzhou, it will teach you to be forgiving.

Hiking up the hills, boating on the lake and the beautiful gardens!

The CAMPUS ON A RAINY DAY (and I was drenched in rain)

So I got to lose myself a bit writing two poems while in Hangzhou. One is here, the other one (The Three Stones 磊) you can find it out on this site if you are interested to read.


By the West Lake

The bird is down – black, bruised and beaten.
The bookmark stares emptily at its hollow pages.
Something was meant to be in there.
Perhaps scribbles of words,
passages claiming a live pulse.
Perhaps a title blotted in emotion.

The dust jacket and the still feathers.

The bookmark is lonely.
The bird is down.


Someone failed a heart.


Most of the gardens and tourist attractions including museums are free. So you can take a leisurely walk at any time and find yourself in the midst of green beauty. Most of these pictures are from the botanical garden 植物园 right behind the campus. It’s free after 5pm. And guess what, you can bypass the entrance fee by hiking up the hill taking a track behind the main library building on the campus 😀


You’ll enjoy the food here. But honestly speaking, I like the Northeast food more, they tend to be more flavourful (and saltier) than the food here (which is sweet). The two most famous local restaurants are 外婆家 (wai po jia) 折味馆 (zhe wei guan) , both very cheap. I prefer the first one as the food is much better with more choices. There is also a famous 茶餐厅, its nice environment but I didn’t find the food any better than wai po jia. Also, you can go to a tea village and eat at the farmer’s house, that’s an awesome experience. For me, I have been busking under my several friends’ (most appear to be professors here) hospitality.


Pakistan: A state in crisis

This article was published on bdnews24.com on 23rd July, 2011.


Pakistan as a sovereign state is a geographic reality dictated by its boundary, but its internal and external strategic policy indicates that it is no less than a state in serious crisis. Furthermore, the identity that Pakistan as a country enshrines since its conception has become contorted as much as it remains an unfinished and fragmented cause. Pakistan’s inept leaders successfully manufactured India as its existential threat and is complacent to be preoccupied by such idea. It helps to bolster their cause of being an Islamic state and keeps the army at bay, ignoring the fact it is virtually hijacked by its gigantic military establishment. The contemporary political Pakistan testifies enough that some extraordinary and painful works still needed to be done for the cause of its identity and its statehood. Furthermore, this has to be done accounting the strategic reality of Pakistan.

Since the Operation Enduring Freedom (OEF) by the US forces, Pakistan’s neighbour: Afghanistan’s condition has changed for better or for worse. At least, it had two parliamentary elections and has a functioning democracy albeit a very imperfect one. It is a country at war and the ISAF and the US forces are still struggling to fend off the Taliban, despite a surge in troops by Obama administration and the development of a ‘professional’ Afghan security sector. Pakistan has a strategic interest in its neighbour since Afghanistan has long been considered its ‘strategic depth’.

However, Pakistan’s policy towards Afghanistan turns out to be rather ineffective, at least during the post-cold war era. Misguided by the historical proximity to Taliban, Pakistan takes Taliban as a safer bet for its stable sway over Afghanistan for the long run. Predicting that Taliban will ultimately survive the NATO and US onslaught, Pakistan’s covert proximity to Taliban is not beyond credible suspicion. Therefore, it is not surprising at all that as much as the geography of Pak-Afghan border appears to be difficult to scramble for uprooting the Taliban, complicity of Pakistan’s former or current intelligence commanders is equally a significant factor for the Taliban and other Islamic militant groups’ resilience.

Numerous sources underscores that Pakistan’s ISI personnel directly or indirectly provide supports to Lashkar-e-Taiba, Harakat-ul-Mujahedeen, Hizbul Mujahedeen and Haqqani Network. Recent uproar in Pakistan’s journalist society after the murder of Saleem Shahzad further testifies the extent of the ISI’s complicity in maintaining active contacts with the militants. Besides Saleem Shahzad, there were numerous others who disappeared, murdered or forced to shut their mouth whenever the ISI was under the attack of investigative journalism. In fact, in addition to the ISI complicity, Pakistan’s military was suspected of being infiltrated by the Islamic extremist ideology which raised significant question for the safety of its nuclear arsenals.

Furthermore, Pakistani commander’s parallel role of fighting the Taliban and al-Qaeda in one front in the name of counter-terrorism and its simultaneous support of various Islamic militant groups on the other, have caused critical lack of trust between the military and the militants. These militant groups’ link either with the Taliban or with the al-Qaeda has enabled both not only to withstand the war waged by the US and the current Afghan government but also to get reinforced and to retaliate from Pakistan’s rear.

Moreover, it is the frontline Pakistani soldiers and the poor civilians, whose eventual karma is to be an IDP, pay the price of Pakistan government’s pretentious war. The irony is that the same philosophy of these groups that Pakistan exploits as a proxy drive against its arch enemy India for the cause of Kashmir, can and will be eventually a bitter pill to swallow for itself. If Afghanistan as an institutional democracy and an Islamic republic by constitution falls short of being a Dar-ul-Islam (land of Islam), Pakistan too will not be spared when time is ripe for these militant groups vying to establish their control over Pakistan. As such, Pakistan’s relationship with the US as well as with its neighbours fails to cement durable and meaningful trust.

Somewhere back in the history, Pakistan also lost the cause of its national interest in its people. When the struggle to improve the lot of its own people should be the raison d’Etat of Pakistan as a state, its national interest became over occupied by its animosity towards India. Its revered military who often gets the blank cheque from its people is either preoccupied playing war games with India or too eager to rule the country whenever it deems necessary.

However, it is not only the military that is responsible but also the political parties and their inept leadership for over 60 years. The reason Pakistan as a state is an unfinished task is because it still has a vast area under FATA (Federally Administered Tribal Area) which is ruled under the FCA (Frontier Crime Regulation) act of 1901 that denies fundamental rights to the tribal population with opaque governance mechanism run by the Pakistani bureaucrats. Discriminating jirga-justice based on customary laws fails to ensure any form of democratic rights to its residents. They are victims of both the militants as well as the whimsical rule by the government Pakistani Agents (PA). When justice is denied and the state fails to establish democratic rights, 60 years are enough for its residents to lose any sense of affiliation with the Pakistani cause.

It is not indifferent either when Pakistan is also taken as a fragmented identity taking into account of Baluchistan, where provincial and federal government rely more on military solution rather than a political one for quelling the Baluch cause. The number of insurgents there may have declined after decades of Pakistani military’s brutal operation but the face and nature of the insurgents transformed too. The new insurgents with leaders such as Allah Nazar of BLF (Baloch Liberation Front) and their sympathizers are now from the educated class, who has a more critical reason for their struggle against Pakistan. They are the result of the oppression by the Pakistani military establishments. Even the Sindh province is not immune from communal crisis where party politics are still run along the ethnic cleavage, where whether one is Muhajir or not is more important. Deadly riot as recent as the one in July is a proof of that.

Provided all these complex internal crisis and Pakistan’s geopolitic nightmare, it can still thrive to be a strong nation only when as a state, it cares less to develop short range missiles with tactical nuclear warhead and cares more to improve its governance. Pakistan has to prove still worthy of being a state which invests into its people’s welfare instead of prioritizing military aid. It also has to take a foreign policy that is multilateral instead of either aligning with the US or China only.

Finally, Pakistan should take the new opportunity of settling unresolved issues with India and not jeopardize the bilateral peace effort by its ISI’s covert support to militant groups against India. It is never too late for its leaders to think hard how to rein in its belligerent intelligence establishment.